What it feels like... It feel like screaming your head off in pain, but no one else could hear, no one else could understand how much it hurts, and you're left all alone screaming inside your own head, screamibg thru the pain... It hurts so much, an excruciating pain and i want to kill myself just to end it all... Just to end all the pain i feel...

If i could, I'd live in the moment i met you..... Not that it meant anything big, and people nowadays deny my memories. But i remember the day i met you, almost as clear as day... Teetering down the club steps in my heels, you werent the first person i met, chatted with drunk wasted guys, and you were one of those drunk wasted guys... I excused myself so many times, coz eventually I'd get bored.. And the club was built as a circle, and after i tried to put myself together in the bathroom.. Teetering down the steps on my heels, walkind around the circle, and id run into you over and over again... Excused myself after a while after chatting, over and over again...... Until i found my back against the wall, then there was you.... It was late and the club was closing. You told me you and your friends were leaving...... Then you grabbed my hand, and told me i was leaving... Teetering up the steps.... I dont exactly remember what you said to me, but i was laughing my head off when we go out of the club.... I dont remember when i took my shoes off, but i was driving barefoot out of the parking lot... Then the next morning, i remember waking up with a headache, opened the curtains and the window to your balcony, looked down on tje street... And suddenly remembered where i was...... Then, years on, i remember when you pulled me out of the bar, grabbed my hand and pulled me thru the Makati sidewalk, then stopped, under a streetlight, and kissed me... And right then i felt like i remembered lifetimes with you..... I know we've had so many lifetimes together... And i'm sorry you dont realize it, that this time you're about to lose me again.... I dont know why you messaged me again, after so much time, just perfect time when... i was all alone.... I hope you realize it before its too late.... All these years, and all these lifetimes, and i'm tired.... Im so tired of this lifetime, and i hope you realize its too late, that i need you, and im so tired now without you, and i'm sorry but i'm so lonely.....i hope you realize it before its too late.... You're about to lose me again..... Help, save me.....